Saturday, March 5, 2011

So Close

Yet so far. The ticker on the side of my blog says that Liam is due in 102 days! That seems so soon! Yet my hubby is due to be home in like half that time, and yet that seems so far away.  Although the animals and I have definitely fallen into a routine over the last 6 months, it still feels like we are just going through the motions blindly until our home is complete again.  I miss hearing him in the house, and seeing him down the hall way. I miss waiting to see his truck pull up when he gets home from work. Sitting with him on the couch. Watching him watch sports. Telling him to get off the computer and sit with me. Telling him to stop changing the channel on the radio in the car.
I think these last days are going to be the hardest.  Just waiting for time to pass by.  I've been working on getting everything ready for the hubby to come home.  Its really hard to focus on getting things ready for Liam, when I'm still trying to get ready for William.  I have the feeling that sometime after the hubby gets back I'll have a freak out moment about how little time until I have to endure labor and birth a baby.  Which takes me off topic.  I plan on not having an epidural for delivery.  When people ask me about this and I tell them my plan, everyone looks at me like I'm an idiot.  This is really getting on my nerves.  Do people really think that I am so dumb to think that labor isn't going to hurt? That pushing out a baby isn't going to hurt? I understand this, I expect pain. I also expect and plan to manage it by not using an epidural.  There are pain relief measures available to get me through until I'm in active labor. Epidural is not the end all be all in pain management.  I've worked in OB, I'm not stupid. Please don't judge me because I am choosing to not have an epidural.  Now of course, if I have to have a c-section, I know I will get an epidural.  I'll deal with that if that situation presents itself.  I think that one of the reasons people think I'm not going to follow through with the no epidural thing is because of my reasoning.  People think that people who do the whole natural birth thing are doing so because their all hippy like and don't want to medicate the baby.  Well I'm not one of those people. I just dont like feeling numb, and I'm not cool with the risks involved in getting one. There. End of story. I have that right, so back off! Don't smirk at me and say, "oh you'll change your mind once you feel it". What are you trying to prove? That you are some labor and delivery goddess because one time you had a baby? I wasn't there judging your pain management then, so don't judge mine. .:steps off of soap box:.
So to get ready! The hubby's welcome home sign came in! I'm not going to post it on here until I know he won't have access to the blog until he comes home. I don't want him getting a sneak peak! But its super cute, and I can't wait to hang it on the fence of our house! I can't wait to buy groceries and get to include things that he will use at home. I'm counting down the days!
26 weeks

2 comments:

  1. Go with what feels right, darling. And don't let anyone try to scare you into something that you know isn't for you.
    xoxox
    Estelle

    Plus, you are looking super cute. Pregnacy looks good on you. lol

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  2. You are an ADORABLE pregnant woman! I agree- do what you feel comfortable with! I feel the same way you do!

    Also, YAY for the sign coming in! I'm going to hang ours in the garage so he'll see it when we open the door and pull in! I am still at the point where I get sad in te grocery store because I'm not buyin him little snacks and stuff he likes. I CAN'T WAIT!

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