Thursday, December 2, 2010

Deployment Life on the Wife End

I have discovered things that used to take me a few minutes, seem to take up my entire day now.  I just don't seem to have the time, now that I have the energy.  I have realized a lot of it has to do with my new body attachment.  Not the baby.  The laptop.  When the hubby moved to 29 Palms and I stayed in Memphis for a month, I always had my phone on me.  But this is different.  I have set up my phone so that I am alerted whenever my hubby tries to contact me on AIM or Facebook or even Yahoo!.  I sleep with a laptop on the pillow next to me, and an iPhone turned up on max with a house phone next to that. I am on a schedule so that I only leave the house only during the time in which I know my husband is asleep.  If I do leave when he may be awake I take great care to leave before he wakes up, and have my laptop with me in a place that has wifi by the time he will be awake.  All this might seem like a lot of work.  But it really isn't like work to me.  Its almost like a teenaged girl who is always waiting for that phone call from that boy, she walks around the house with her phone on her constantly.  But I'm an adult, and I'm married to that boy.  And this really isn't that crazy.  There are probably a million Marines that would read this and think, 'I don't want my wife acting like that'.  From the outside, my behavior may look obsessive.  But I don't do this for me.  I mean, yeah, I want to talk him, all the time.  But I do it for him.  I want him to know that whenever he wants me, needs me, or is thinking about me, I am there.  I am just a message away.  And I will be that close to him every minute of everyday while he is away.  If its 0200, and he wants to tell me anything, I am available to him.  It makes me happy to know that I can make him feel more secure and connected to home by having constant access to me.  Now, there are definitely consequences to this.  For one thing people think I'm online.....all the time.  I am, but not for them, and not actually.  No offense.  If I don't answer your 4 am fb chat....its because you are not him.  I will literally roll over, see who it is, then go back to sleep if you are not William.  Naturally I am a little sleep deprived....but hey, I'm pregnant.  If I'm not getting up to pee every couple of hours I'm ignoring AIM messages and Skype calls from strangers.  And yes this does open me up to getting some very strange messages from some very strange Germans.  But its all worth it.  Last night at 2 am I got to talk to my husband on Skype for 2 hours.  I got to see his face, and even hear his voice for a little bit.  And that is why I am a slave to my laptop and the internet....how could I possibly miss that? Or worse, how could I know that he tried to get a hold of me....but there was no answer?

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